The blurry line between Winter and Spring has certainly been evident this year. As I sit writing this in the early morning just two days after the start of Spring, the sun glistens off more than a foot of snow that just finished falling last night. While most of us are disgruntled about it, we had the same thing happen just a year ago. I can attest to that because I wrote a post about it.
While we are never sure of God’s timeline in our lives, I was absolutely convinced we wouldn’t be here in the fall. And yet, we didn’t even find an RV until mid-October. And then winter hit. And stayed. Throughout the winter months I thought, maybe come Spring it will finally be time to go? And now that Spring is here, well, we’re looking into the summer.
We made a lot of decisions based on the thought we wouldn’t be here for long. Nothing major. Things like how many dance classes to enroll our daughter in and the kinds of school activities and curriculum we would use. And as the months continued to pass, it became harder and harder because there was the constant not knowing.
I’d be lying if I said I was good at waiting. And while God has certainly done a lot in my heart at knowing He has a perfect plan, I still don’t often enjoy the process. Waiting can be painful.
But in the waiting is where we can really encounter Him. We can lay aside our preconceived notions of how we think things should go, and trust that even our best laid plans pale in comparison to what He can do through us. We can learn to recognize that in the winter He’s growing us and preparing us for what’s to come.
I’m learning that who God is and who I am doesn’t change regardless of what I am walking through. While our natural instinct is to simply look ahead to the season that isn’t yet, God says, “But I have things for you right here.” Surrender is slowly teaching me to say, “God, take me deeper” rather than, “God, what are you doing?” It is teaching me that there are things right in front of me I might miss out on simply because I’d rather be in any season but this one.
A beautiful friend of mine fasted and prayed for us as we were transitioning last year after selling our house. I won’t share all of what she heard for us, but I certainly have seen these words come to pass this year. “He is in the waiting. Wait- not losing hope- but with expectation for He will be the one to open the door.”
We certainly have done all that we feel like we can do. Every possible lead we have explored has come to a dead-end. And while it’s incredibly frustrating, it also calls me deeper into Him. Because I have no doubt that waiting on Him and expecting Him to move will bring more honor to Him and raise expectations all around us about what is possible.
Surrender reminds me that God takes His time for a reason. There’s a work He’s still doing even though I can’t see it. I know we we look back at this time and so much will make sense that didn’t make sense in the moment.
So even though it often feels like we are in the winter, I know that our spring is coming.
I’ve learned in this season of waiting that it’s certainly easy to doubt that you hear from God. It’s easy to entertain the Enemy’s lies that God won’t come through. That He really didn’t even tell you what you know in your heart He did. And I honestly believe that this lie perpetuates the heart of many Christians, simply because Spring didn’t come when they hoped it would. If we’re not careful, we can wait and lose hope.
But here’s what I’m learning. I can make obedience much more complicated than it needs to be. It’s really this simple. Do I trust Him? Do I trust that He is who He says He is? Do I trust that I am who He says I am? Do I trust that He fulfills His promises? Every? Single? One?
2 Corinthians 1:20 (NIV) reminds us:
For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.
So if the answer to all of those questions is yes, then the thing to do is simply throw my arms open wide and jump into His arms. I would rather fly wildly through the air during the winter seasons knowing my Father’s eyes are on me, then sitting on the sidelines all spring, wondering if the jump is worth it.
As I was shoveling snow yesterday, I was once again reminded of the peace that comes with a snowfall. The stillness of life all around. The reminder that what is not yet seen, will come. Because the same God who knows when this local winter will end and spring will officially show her face, knows the seasons of my life.
And dear reader, He knows the seasons of your life too.
You just need to decide in your heart, once and for all, that He is worth the waiting.